In this episode, I’m joined by Matthew Greer of My Alpha Life. Matthew joins me to share his story of how he’s been able to overcome the long-term effects of having been sexually abused as a child and not having any support growing up to helping transform the lives of other men who have gone through something similar.
Click the play button below to check it out!
Matthew grew up in what he felt was a normal family with both parents and two younger brothers. When he was four years old he was sexually abused 2 or 3 times by a babysitter. Matthew didn’t feel he could tell anyone because his father reacted to bad news with anger, manifested by physical and emotional abuse. Every day was a challenge to not upset his father. Matthew didn’t feel safe having problems because no matter what he did, it wasn’t good enough.
Effects of the traumatic experience:
Matthew became a people pleaser. He wanted people to like him; he was always seen as the nice or calm guy, but he struggled to show up in relationships. He walked on eggshells and was always afraid of upsetting the status quo.
Matthew also struggled to communicate effectively when he was upset. He also was unable to talk to his parents about the abuse until he was 35.
Overcoming the traumatic experience:
While Matthew was living with his girlfriend and her daughter, he realized he had to change his coping behaviors of retreating and leaning on alcohol or marijuana to numb himself.
When Matthew got laid off from his job in 2010 he blamed it on the recession instead of looking inward. He started doing Amway and, by doing so, learned to take responsibility for things that happen in his life. His girlfriend and his Amway sponsor were both very supportive, which helped push him forward in his healing journey. He learned about not letting the past hold him back.
Attending live events where he's been able to work on his personal development have also been very helpful in Matthew's healing. He's found that being accepted was a huge part of the support he received. And, without his coach, Matthew would still be stagnating as she kept him on the right path and helped validate him.
Matthew is currently writing a book “Breaking Free from the Cycle” for launch in December.
What Matthew does today: Matthew is a Certified Coach.
Given what you know now, if you could go back to when you were going through the tough times and give yourself one piece of advice, what would it be?
Matthew's Answer: You are perfect the way you are and everything is the way it is supposed to be.
Matthew on Social Media:
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